Disclaimer: this is not a religious blog but since I do claim to be a spiritual person I will speak of God when i see fit! Sometimes I have the habit of slipping into Christianese...stop me please. Peace! :)

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Trust

Trust. Why is it so difficult to trust? Perhaps because we give up some of our rights, some of our individuality, some of our control? I'm finding it difficult to trust in God, but if I were honest I've been having difficulty for the entirety of my life.

God says he wants to take care of me, that I am his betrothed. But I can never let it go at that. I say, "But Lord, I have responsibilities..." "Your responsibility is me." Every question has a simple answer with him. I hate that. I hate that because I am not a simple being. Everything is so complicated for me. I have to concentrate to be simple.

I worry less if I trusted more. But I think a part of me is afraid if I trust completely these balls I've been juggling will fall. But I am coming to realize even if they fall, so what? Love, be full of joy and don't worry. Be happy. This is what I hear him telling me and I'm like, "What? Have you seen my life lately?"

I know I complicate matters. I know I overanalyze everything. It is time for me to find my zen haha. I need to trust in him more. He told me I decide not to worry. He can't take worry away. It has to be a decision I make. Like most habits, it can only be broken by deciding to be different. It is perhaps the worst addiction, worry. I think it is so much a part of who we are at this point, so connected to our humanity, it will take constant endurance not to fall back into it. Let us decide not to worry today. let us trust. For he is able to provide for our every need, and then some. Trust.

People Get Ready

It has become apparent to me that earth is extremely vulnerable. I know what I am about to say will sound like insanity and most likely no one will listen and wave me off as a nut. Nothing new about that. People have never gravitated toward me.

No one wants to think about this, and no one certainly wants to talk about it. And if anyone does they are called a crazy. The fact is we have been very arrogant. We assume there is no life outside this planet and that our defenses are strong enough to combat anything that should attack us. Ridiculous! We don't even have a prototype for a space-worthy vessel. That I know of. I pray the government is hiding this big project. I pray I am not the only one thinking about this but that people in power have thought of this as well.

You can call me a science fiction freak. People who think I am allowing that to sway my judgment is ignorant. I am a realist. I am all about preparation. I don't want to be caught holding the bag. I don't want to be caught off-guard when another race comes knocking on our door. It is ignorant and stupid to assume none will. Every nation of this world began by thinking they were the only race in existence. Over time and with experience and education, we all learned there were other nations on the earth and that not all of them were exactly friendly.

What would happen if a fleet of ships showed up in earth's atmosphere and started firing? Oh yes I can hear the Christian mantra: "God won't let that happen. God will protect us." Like he protected the Jews? Like he protected the Christians after the resurrection? Don't get me wrong Jesus Christ is pretty much my life and I am not doubting his power. I am doubting mankind's assumptions about him. Where in the bible does it say God will reach down his hand and save us from our troubles? From what I can see we're all about facing down and triumphing over troubles. We thrive when the risk is the highest. Right?

So we cannot assume Jesus is going to come down and save us, protect us. Earth is ours; we have been given domination over it. He expects we can take care of it and protect it. Speaking of which, where did this "rescue me" syndrome come from? That's another blog post.

In order to create a defensive front against attack we must unite. It is that simple. Most people get itchy at the prospect of one-world government, or one-world religion for that matter. But that is the way it must be. The problem is man cannot handle absolute power. So what to do? I have my ideas. but no one wants to unite. We are all so individualistic and we don't want to give up any of our rights. Part of peace is the giving up of rights. It's just that simple.

All of Egypt united under one man and became one of the farthest reaching empires in human history. As well as Greece and China. They were run by cruel men who enslaved other men to suit their purposes. We understand this is the wrong way. So what is the right way? How is it possible for us all to unite under one banner without slavery? As a Christian I would say that is simple. As a human I would say not so much.

The simple fact is something no one wants to face. We will be approached by another race, now or later. The question is, will we be ready? and I do not mean to assume any race to come into contact with us will be a malevolent one. There is the chance that we might actually have good luck and a peaceful, exploratory race will come upon us and will merely desire trade relations and relationship. If that is the case we can't come out guns blazing. We could start an intergalactic war none of us would survive to see the end of. By 'ready' I mean prepared, for whatever the circumstance.

We have to have the intelligence not to be naive about our vulnerable position in the universe and yet we have to have the wisdom not to want to kill anything we don't understand. We are very far from that now. We skip from one extreme to the other. We either arrogantly assume there is no life outside this planet or we have a militant attitude and want to shoot anything we can't understand. We must have cunning AND wisdom. How is this possible?

Dancing

I want to do a historical study on dance. I find it very interesting that this age-old practice finds itself in nearly every culture. I would like to study its origin. If anyone has any tidbits for me to cite on its history, feel free to comment.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Ability

I am entering a season where I don't really care. The things that meant so much to me are...negotiable. I used to want to be married desperately, but lately I don't really care. I want children, I know that but right now it is not a priority. Sometimes it is difficult being around other families, where they are happily married or at least in a monogamous relationship, and have babies to take care of. It is difficult because I want children very badly. Sometimes I doubt, seriously doubt, there is anyone out there for me. I do not say this because of lack of self-esteem. I say this because I am so different. I am considered odd or unique among my own friends. It takes a special man to appreciate uniqueness...and I haven't found one yet who can appreciate mine, one who is attracted to me. Despite these things, I am not overly concerned with a mate.

I am more focused on being who God has created me to me. GRACE=the divine ability to DO and to BE all that God has called us to be. It's not just about doing, it's about being. I am concentrating on BEING. I do most everything a good Christian should do...but I want to BE everything God wants me to be.

Stargate SG-1 Storyline

Welcome to the Stargate SG-1 storyline. This is a continuation of the show, co-written by Callie and myself. We kind of go over the last two seasons, adding whatever we feel necessary, so if you are a Stargater, this is my disclaimer: there are differences. The same goes for the Atlantis storyline. Feel free to join in on the writing or just read for fun.

Stargate Atlantis Storyline

This storyline outlines the activities of the team preceding the events of season 5. The writers include Callie and myself and anyone else who wishes to join the team. You may read the storyline or participate in the writing end. Enjoy!

Vanguard Scribes Welcome

I am pleased to welcome you to VanguardScribes, a place for writers. This will be the home for my Stargate project, which I write with my friend Callie Kelley. The project consists of two storylines which are a continuation of the shows Stargate SG-1 and Stargate Atlantis, with more storylines from the franchise to follow. There will be other storylines as well as Stargate, which I am co-writing with other writers. Feel free to browse or join one of the groups and participate in the writing part.